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Success Builds Confidence!

Living in our dynamic, fast changing worldof him/her, s/he will most likely be more
can be extremely stressful - even for thosedistracted by the game or instructions than
who are processing information at a normallearning  how  to  do  it.
rate. Imagine moving to another country where
you know only a limited amount of theChallenge: Once a child is clearly feeling
language that the nationals speak. It couldcompetent, step up your expectations a bit.
be overwhelming! Now imagine trying to keepFor that instance: If your child is helping
up the same lifestyle you now have in thatyou to make a dinner you've made together
country. Without the support of a trustedoften, pretend that you don't know how to
guide, we'd all fail! What a differentturn on the stove or that you can't find the
experience that would be if you were givenwooden spoon. Give him/her a chance to think
more guidance, such as learning about theabout how to solve these problems. Stay quiet
culture and foundational words in theirand wait patiently to see what s/he does.
language before you go; or going withStep in with some support by demonstrating
somebody  that is familiar with that country!how s/he might work through this problem if s
he is clearly unable to accomplish this
As a parent, being the guide to your childrenchallenge.
is an extremely important role; and when you
have a child with autism, the stress of thisEncourage: Using sounds like "Wow!" or
job is amplified all the more. The pace of"ohhhh" while working together can slowly
our world is very fast, and much too fast forbuild  those  feelings  of  competence.
a child with autism to process all that is
necessary to function successfully. Below isSimplify: If your child is showing signs of
the acronym SUCCESS, which offers 7 simplestress (silliness, aggression, attempts to
things you can do to begin a successfulcontrol, running off, etc.), find a way to
guided  relationship  with  your  child.simplify the activity. For instance; If you
are throwing a ball back and forth and he is
Support: Give as much support as your childunable to catch it, get closer and hand him
needs in order to be successful. If it meansher the ball instead of throwing it. You
holding his/her hand to walk a spoon from themight be surprised by what happens when you
table to the sink to make sure that s/he istry this. Often times it feels too simple,
able to do this, then do it! Another way toand that's ok; remember that we are building
show support is to demonstrate what you wantconfidence, the challenge of actually
done so s/he's not trying to guess what it iscatching  the  ball  can  come  later.
you  want  him/her  to  do.
Short: Don't expect your child to stick with
Uninterrupted: Find a space that is quiet andyou for too long, especially if s/he shows a
not full of distractions such as computers,lot of resistance to participating in
books, toys, or siblings. Offering a quietactivities with you. Giving him/her little
space for just the two of you will help himopportunities in which you know s/he'll be
her focus on what is important - thesuccessful is a great way to lay a foundation
relationship between you, and not thefor keeping him/her with you longer in the
activity you are doing. This also meansfuture. Maybe it means that s/he picks up the
staying quiet yourself! Try doing activitieslast block that was on the floor, or dumps
while  using  as  few  words  as  possible!the spaghetti noodles into the water.
Remember that there will always be another
Control: Stay in control of the materials youchance to make the activity longer and more
are using. If you are trying to play a gamecomplicated as his/her confidence builds.
with all the materials to the game in front



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